One of my therapists told me to start a blog to help in my recovery so here we go, enjoy   It is my therapeutic journal to help with my recovery. its for me to tell my story instead of keeping everything bottled up inside like I have always done, not others and the untold/unseen truth eats me up inside.  It gets real so viewer discretion is advised.  

 

6.1.2024 / 12/21/24

 Backstory- So in June of 2024, as I was suffering severe burnout and ministrokes  I decided I wanted to get into shape.  I was tired of being obese and needed a lifestyle change.  I went on a major diet and exercise program  June 1 2024 i weighed in at 295lbs.  So I began to eat right and ride the Peloton 30-60 miles a day.  By my birthday 11/30/2024 I weighed in at 215lbs on the right track I was happy.  Then came DDAY 12/8/2024 the day I was airlifted to Hackensack as I had a full blown stroke.  I was in Hackensack ICU for about 2 weeks then moved to Kessler in Cherry Hill.  When I got to Kessler 12/21/2024 i weighed in at 135lbs.  I thought I was back in 5th grade

12.8.24 I HAVENT SHARED THIS BEFORE

The day my life changed we were down my dad's shore house for the annual holiday parade and I wasnt feeling well.  Lindsey knew something was wrong but I was like Im fine go take the boys to the parade, my mom told her she would stay with me so she went.  30 minutes later i was alone my parents left me and I called Linds and said something's not right come home.  Note my mom lied and left me by myself such a good parent lol.  I called Linds to come home I thought I was having a heart attack.  She rushed home and my saw me and the boys ran across the street to the police station and I collapsed in the garage when the ambulance got there.  I told the police and EMT take me anywhere but SOCH. They said ok Dr Huesser (yes I told them i was a DR lol they assumed MD which changed all the conversations) with the shape your in were gonna be airlifted to Hackensack.  I got my first helicopter ride!  They admitted me to the ICU an hour later.  Surf City police, EMT and the State police helicopter team saved my life along with my Wife and courageous boys who saw me take off in a helicopter they were so brave.  I was there for 2 weeks paralyzed on my right side and discharged to Kessler in Cherry Hill.  

12.21.24

Admitted to Kessler in Cherry Hill for 3 weeks I began my recovery.  Kessler was a tough environment.  I had to do a cognitive and speech test called a CASP to determine what was affected and they told me dont be frustrated we hope u score a 65 that will be good.  I scored 95 and I was mad because the 2 questions I got wrong were questionable and I argued i wanted a 100.  The Dr came in and said luckily it appears I was not affected cognitively just physically.  So I began going hard I wanted out, OT and PT three times a week. Tried to escape for Christmas and New Year's,  but no luck Ii was discharged 1.4.2025.  

2.18.25

Our first baby was diagnosed with cancer and we had to put her down.  We got Maycee Raine when we went sure if we could have kids.  She was my biggest PITA, always escaping, running away, and impossible to catch.  The house isn't the same without you

1.4.25 - 6.1.25 

Double sessions twice a week at Moss Magee (real name then Jefferson bought them), putting in the work.  Enjoying my kids watching them play sports both play travel baseball for WD Storm and travel soccer for West Deptford Soccer Club two amazing organizations.  Living my life the best I can, trying to get back into the professional circles, but taking my time.  

7.1.25

Today I was diagnosed with Psuedobublar Affect (PBA) from the stroke.  They said I can go on medicine to help ease it but I declined.  Just another hurdle.... Its a gift and a curse.  Its mainly laughing for me not crying but still tough...  What is PBA: Take a closer look at PBA symptoms

7.31.25

I found out today from a slip-up unnamed source that my scum bag Aunt Kath and Pathetic Sister Shannon created a narrative that I prevented my sister from seeing my dad why he was going through treatment.  Wow.  Apparently, I prevented her from going to over 100 infusion immunotherapy treatments / doctor appointments 2 major surgeries that were life-threatening Shannon and her family never there, not once showed up for anything.  My dad moved in with me 5 days a week and the best part of his day even though he was tired and sick was seeing his Connor and Cody and getting his bets in.  She never visited him at the house either..... My boys unselfishly lived through this tough time seeing Pop Pop Seashore sick and helped him along the way.  How pathetic are you and your family to have to create a lie so you can live with the fact you weren't there for your dying father? She and her family are pathetic.So if you run into my sister know she is a pathetic liar worried about her image than doing the right thing PATHETIC. 

8.1.25

My dad went on hospice this month. Nobody told me.  After I was his caregiver for 2 years helping him beat Esophageal Cancer, which he was cancer free since May 2024 he decided to give up as his support system (me) was gone.  I visited him for the last time this weekend even though Harv and I shared many conversations during his treatments and on the beach on the Summer of 2024 it was tough saying goodbye to my best friend.  I often think if I didnt have this stroke he'd still be alive. 

FYI, I don't have relationships with anyone on my side of the family especially my drug addicted mother and lying pathetic sister since my stroke.  

Before My dad died I had several impactful conversations with him the summer of 2023 but none more important than his last day of immunotherapy treatments in the infusion center in May 2023.  As he was getting his last chemo he told me to have a seat he wanted to talk about the past the present and the future and it was going to be a hard conversation.  It was the most candid conversation I ever had with my father he said this conversation is tough it's it might break you or make knowing you it will make you stronger. but you need to hear it so listen up which I did, I didn't say a word just listened.  He said when I'm gone you're basically losing your only parent because your mother her order is simple Shannon (my undiagnosed autistic sister) is her number one and Shannon's family that will never change you've seen just we could talk about all the ways that but it's not worth your time.  #2 is her sister Kath.  I hate her with a passion never will forgive or respect her,  he told me the day she threw me out of her house was the last time I would ever talk to her and said I just deal with her because she's your mom's sister and I don't feel like fighting your mom.  I have so many untold stories Ill share in my book that will shock so many people.  Sadly someone he hated so much was there when he passed that I felt bad for him. Then comes you a distant 3 he said. I wrote my mom a truth letter that I havent sent yet as we do not have a relationship, I will one day.  I WILL SHARE ALL DETAILS IN THE BOOK, YOU WONT BE DISSAPOINTED.  They are outta my life for the best and I dont have anymore animosity or hate because God told me to let those people go from life. It has been a true blessing.  

This whole time I was recovering I thought my mom was getting my dad better and stronger like I was doing but that was all bullshit she was helping him give up not push him like I did.  People ask what has your family done for you post stroke. My parents (I dont count my dad he was busy trying to give up on his life) bought me a pair of Skechers like Harv, 2 shirts, some Auntie Ann's pretzels for her grandsons the 3 times she came up to visit all with Harv he probably made her, and $200 to take my family out to dinner.... Thats All. .  The last time Harv visited me on July 1st sitting on my couch he looked at me and said u look good but could lose some more weight I was 130lbs at the time. 

Harv was tough on me my whole life. This was a prime example he just abused me and deflected too.   People thought I had it easy growing up,I didnt i just faked a lot.  I was mentally abused, my whole life as you can see even recently, and it plays a toll on me more now.  It wasn't just tough love like he called it because he targeted me and thats it.   I think that's why I drank at an early age and made the decisions I did because of my environment.  When I confronted my dad he scolded me and said get tough stop being a whiny pussy.  His parenting style taught me to be a better parent.

I am building a strong village to get me through this. 

Those people (the woman who gave birth to me - not a real mom, sister and her family, irrelevant blood relatives, because blood doesnt make you real family) are outta my life for the best and I dont have anymore animosity or hate because God told me to let those people go from life. It has been a true blessing.  Next step for them is to keep my name out of their mouth.   

8.17.2025

Harv passed today.  Hes in a better place.  Im gonna miss the daily I locked myself outta FanDuel call.  Everyday even when I was in ICU post-stroke he asked me to put a bet in.  Harv was 1 of a kind.  My dad was always tough on me and during so of last heart to heart he opened up on alot.  Ill share later.  I lost my best friend and biggest abuser all in one.  

9.1.2025

Now that Harv is gone, I can focus on getting better.  It's all about Me vs Me. I miss him a lot I was truly the only caregiver that actually did good by him

9.4.2025

I received a 365 day devotional when I had my stroke called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.  I read it every morning.  Today's message was Accept Each Day as it Comes.  This is very powerful in my situation and that is exactly what I am doing

9.5.2025

Received my Motus Nova device to help with my arm recovery. It is a great device I use every day.  Motus Nova Stroke Rehab Recovery at Home

9.23.25

Did a mile on the treadmill.   More rehab accomplishments to come..

Walked 2 laps without my AFO brace this week and timed walks. 

9.25.25

Went to the Dr today for a checkup and he asked why are you here today.  I said I am here to get a prescription for Ozempic.  He doesnt get my humor yet, I was still 135lbs lol.

10.1.25

Did a reval today for PT I'm showing signs of steady improvement.  Completed a kneel-to-stand drill.

Slowly making progress on the hand grasp the my therapist Melissa R, she kills me every week. 

10.17.25-10.19.25

WD Storm hosted the annual field of screams tournament and Connor also had the Cherry hill kick or treat tournament so it was a busy weekend. Worked the snackstand on Sunday.  Cody got MVP for his game Saturday.  Connor's soccer team lost the championship on an own goal with 20 seconds left and finished 2nd.  He bounced back on Sunday as his 11u Storm team won the championship.  So, overall a good weekend.  

10.19.25

Before Lindsey and I could have kids we fostered 66 dogs before adopting Maycee who we had to put down at age 12 in Feb due to Cancer.  So we decided to get back on the foster train welcoming number 6-7 lol to our home.  Its a challenge in my condition, but well worth it. The boys named him Shadow.  If you want him go to www.puppiesandmorerescue.com 

10.24.25

I want to give a shout out to the most amazing team I'm working with. 

Front Desk

Arneka and Gina

Main Therapists

Melissa R and Melissa K and Kristen H

Backup Therapist 

Stacy, Makayla, Lauren 

 DJ and talk to sports about therapists 

Matt, Jeff and Bonnie

Speech and everything under the sun 

Michelle P

10.31.25

Today we held our annual Halloween party. The wife held it down this year, I took over as sous chef.   It felt good to continue the tradition and see all the kids happy while being around Framily and friends.  

 11.5.25-11.7.2025

Wife booked a camping trip for the boys.  Obviously, a cabin in my condition, but it was nice to get away.  Great job, babe, I love you!

 11.8.25

After my stroke my doctors never explained to me the emotional and some physical changes going on in my brain.  They explained anxiety and depression, but being a dr who studied psychosocial support in cancer patients, I knew how to deal with those two hurdles.  They didn't prepare me for not being a good husband in my eyes to the best wife ever.  I did my research on how to emotionally be a better husband post stroke.  It said to make a note to do things and i started today with give your beautiful wife a good morning kiss.  I caught her off guard I think, its sadly been 9 months since we last kissed, but today was the start of new beginnings.  Teaching myself that things are not always gonna come normal and to do better.  

11.9.25

At Connor's soccer game in East Greenwich following Codys on gamechanger at the same time Linds and I were split duty.  I started thinking about Harv how he should be next to me watching his grandson, but instead he chose to give up.  I know why he gave up selfishly and I thought why the F didnt I put myself instead of him. But Heart problems  a bad home life, and losing me around he chose to give up.  We do anything for the people we love.  He would be so proud of my boys how much they have overcome and are turning out.  Miss ya Pop Pop Seashore.    

11.10.25

Browsing the SKCC facebook and website to see what I missed on my career journey I never relized for all the posts etc how much of an influence I was at SKCC.  Scientifically and administratively, I knew, but just looking back how much I was Mr. SKCC  and the impacts I had.  It makes me sad for all the types of dropoffs at SKCC since I left looking that Im still a major part of their FB stories and website posts and I have been gone for over a year.

11.11.25  

Feeling very accomplished today, Speech I set new PR for my tongue  275 impressions and lip 255 impressions which are near par for a non stroke victim.  For pt/ot I did planks/4knees leaning on my paralyzed arm for the first time.  Kristen pushed me really hard today.  Like Ice Cube says today was a good day.  Took Shadow for a walk, he's not a fan of the cold. Applied for several jobs after meeting with a recruiter.  Feeling accomplished.   Shout out to Kelly Fenuto for pushing me.... you rock and are a true inspiration 

11.13.25  

Had my bi-weekly Motus Nova session.  My coach said I made significant progress with my grip and hand movement and hopefully in December after the year anniversary ill see a jump.  Went to the first WD Storm Booster Club Meeting. so blessed to see this organization grow and my family to be a part of it.  

11.14.25

After doing rehab at home I got to go to lunch with my forever date and we ran into some friends Josh and Liz Amburg. It was great seeing them.  i missed our lunch dates, felt good to get back to some normalcy.  Being a single mom to 2 kids and 1/2 a husband is tough. I give my wife all the credit in the world she is an amazing woman.    

11.15.2025

Today we said goodbye to Shadow.  Off to a great family, he was a great foster definitely top 5 out of 67 dogs we have fostered.  No foster will beat bankster (baxter) as my niece Klo called him when she was about 6.  Boys now understand the process super proud of them as they continue to learn volunteering makes a difference and matters like their parents have always stressed and taught. 

11.16.2025

I've realized a lot this week so it was a great week.  11months and 7 days since my stroke I am showering 100% myself, dressing 90% shoes and socks are tough, resumed making dinners for the fam and meals for myself, I can butter toast which is hard with 1 arm, doing my steps 16 of them 10X a day to get to my office to do work, mobility is getting better, not using my cane in the house at all which is making me more confident, went to a meeting and got into it climbing tough stairs I would have never tried with the help of the Tulls one on each arm, i no longer need assistance of a couch or chair (you shoulda seen the contraption Sonny my lifesaving builder BIL built I look back and cant believe I needed that) Progress v patience is my motto and the progress I am making pushes me harder everyday.  Well, it's Sunday off to Soccer for both boys, Connor home, Cody in Woodstown.  Then get ready for the Birds v Detroit tonight, and I can pop open a nice ice cold Miller Lite

11.17.25

Made chicken cutlets homemade for dinner after my Motus Nova Session.  Moved up to Level 12, which is a major accomplishment.  

11.18.25

Tough day at rehab with Melissa R.  Did the stairs 5 times up and down without the afo brace and did the pods with my hands (even the bad one) and set a new record 33 taps in 30 seconds. Continued to build the WD Storm organization website its coming along nicely.  Texted with Dina L today, a friend I consider a sister more than my own.  Life is busy it sucks we cant get together more

11.19.2025

Cooking skills are coming back with 1 arm.  Made beef stew with homemade gluten-free dumplings, not easy but the were delicious.  Worked on some projects for Fairway Strategies it was a busy day.  Worked on my book a little it is coming along slowly but steady.

11.20.25

Busy Day.  At rehab Melissa R had me do 10 pushups and arm raises on my bad arm, success!  Then did bloodwork and a urine sample, which I did by myself this time, I couldn't complete it last time too hard, Doc wants to take me off some meds, and came home and did some work on the Storm website.  It was a good day. 

11.22.25 

This morning Linds got up to volunteer to setup nets for the Thanksgiving Soccer Tournament.  I did it for the for the last 6 years.  It made me sad missing it today but I will be back next year.  My devotional this morning said Trust Me and all your Thoughts.  Well thats what I am doing Lord.  Texted Pastor Dave yesterday to break his stones about the Bills losing to Houston it was good to see his thoughts on why the Bills stink this year

11.23.25

Today I took another step towards getting back to normal.  Did some food shopping like my chore responsibility in the past and conquered the crazy WD Shoprite on a Sunday by myself. Codeman was by my side to provide support if I ran into trouble, but it was good .  The nomal bs 3 people ran into me and had 2 morons in the handicap lane, but other that I dominated.  Ran into my neighbors Joanne K and Kevin K as I buzzed through the store.  We had the Tulls over for the Birds game, after Connor spent the afternoon at their place it was so nice to catch up with such good friends.  Sucked as a sports day Philly took 3Ls none worse than the Union Playoff loss as a 1 seed.  Not renewing my season tix next year.  Birds need to Fire Patullo, Hire Daboll, and release Gipson.  Rant over.  

11.26.25

Happy Strangers Things Release Day.  In 2022 I watched Season 4 up at Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Jeffs lakehouse enjoying ice cold adult beverages with my cousin Jillian.  Good times Great memories. 

11.27.25

 HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Last year I spent it with Harv preparing his last thanksgiving holiday little did I know.  This year spending it with the people i care about the most in this world My perfect Wife, the boys, Sonny Jess and the girls, Grammy Pammy, Uncle Jeff and Aunt Cheryl, and the best hosts Jaclyn Steve Carter n Blair.  Its gonna be a great day 

11.29.25

Tough day on the cold field, boys lost both games.  On a good night was able to navigate to both of Connor's Games; Linds was on Code duty.  We picked up our new rescue, an 8-month-old Cane Corso Mastiff mix that we named Paisley.  Went to Dinner Friday with the Tulls at Riverwinds to celebrate Bill's Bday

11.30.025

Happy Birthday to me! Blessed to be able to celebrate 44.  Both boys had 9am soccer games in the cold rain/ Same duty as yesterday,  Connor had a clean sheet in goal with 2 assists for the first half up 5-0 then he got to play the field, which is rare, and almost scored a goal.  Then went to guest play with the older kids, where Jake Blesi and him did amazing being the younger kids and lost 3-2 to Cherry Hill a powerhouse club. Code didn't fair so well.  Then we came home, watched some Christmas shows for my birthday, ordered takeout because of the weather, opened my gifts and sung Happy Birthday.   It truly was a perfect day.   

12.2.2025

Tough day at rehab went hard today.  

12.4.2025

Another tough rehab session hard but good.  Im not going to get better if i half ass it.  Motus Nova session later today.  Freezing out.  

12.5.25

Busy Day! Had a procedure today to try and fix my "cold shoulder" diagnosis with Dr. Raja, it was painful as hell.  Couple of needles and rehab to follow ughh.....  Went back to school today to become a certified Neuroscience & Neurodiversity Coach, along with my doctoral education in psychosocial support I'm just adding to my expertise to help other people who are suffering from neurological mental issues like stroke or cancer patients. Just what I need more school lol I'm crazy, but I want to be an expert, so I have to put in the work. Paisley went to her furever home today, so were puppy less till the new year. Watched Home Alone 2 with the fam tonight.  

12.6.2025

The boys wanted Grinch meals at McDonalds, so we gave in and went. Tis the season.  Then we watched the Grinch movie and had the poops.  

12.7.2025

1 year ago today.   Burnout and other health issues finally caught up to me.  I suffered my stroke and got my first helicopter ride this time last year.  Thanks to my brave my wife and 2 brave liitle boys I made it to the hospital.   knowing below if had all this in red in my case, I might have acted sooner - so people take note it may save your life.  

Core Stroke Symptoms (BE-FAST)

• • B: alance: Sudden dizziness, trouble walking, or loss of coordination. 
  • E: yesight: Sudden blurred vision, double vision, or loss of sight in one or both eyes. 
• F: ace Drooping: One side of the face droops or feels numb; an uneven smile. 
• A: rm Weakness: Sudden weakness or numbness in an arm or leg, especially on one side; one arm drifts down when raised. 
• My right arm and leg
• S: peech Difficulty: Slurred speech, trouble speaking, or difficulty understanding. 
• T: ime to Call 911: If you see any of these signs, call emergency services right away. Connor and Cody ran across the street to Surf City Police Station.   The Police ran over and called EMS they got there and took me to the waiting helicopter.  

I collapsed coming out of the elevator in my wife's and Connor's arms at my dad's Shore house.  I will never forget the fear on my son's face I wish he never had to see that.  I never lost consciousness and instructed the people taking care of me on what I wanted; they listened and were amazing. 

It was the worst day of my life, but a year later and I look at how much progress I'm making I consider it a mere notice from God to get me back on track and focus on the things and people that truly mean something to me.  The quote today from my devotion read "I am with you in all that you do" The Lord was with me a year ago and I feel it more today.  

Man what a day... It has been a life-changing year.  But I never got depressed or down and focused on getting back to 100% for my family which will happen.  

I live by these quotes moving forward... They are me

“If you get tired, learn to rest, not quit. Let someone else fight for you in between” Stuart Scott

“Don’t tell people your plans. Show them your results.” Jim Valvano

“Grow through what you go through Get it Done No Excuses.” Me

“Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in getting up every time we fall.” – Confucius

“The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” John Maxwell

I'm truly blessed and going to take full advantage of my second chance on life.  God Bless.  

12.12.25

Connor, Wolfe, and Jake went to the 6th Grade Winter Wonderland Ball and met the rest of the crew there.  Connor was so excited and had a good time.  Soccer at 8 am made Jake and HIM call it an early night, but I love their commitment and dedication to the sport

12.13.25

Today was Connor's last soccer tournament for 2025 at SOFIVE in Cherry Hill.  He took a beating but never gave up and played hard to the end.  Soccer, since day 1 I love seeing Jake, and him grow, it's something special with those 2.  I am so proud of how hard the 2 of them work and their dedication to the sport and their team.  Good things are going to come for them.  Keep up the good work, boys. We followed Soccer by going out to lunch,  Blesi's, McAfee's, and Huesser's. It was nice to get the boys together.  Afterwards, Linds and I took the boys to see Santa, which I missed last year.  Then Linds took the boys to the Pitman parade.  Busy day.  

12.14.25

We got our 1st significant snowfall in 2 years, YAY!  Kids have been out since 6 am.  Birds better snap this losing streak in the snow today, can't wait.  Baking XMAS cookies today and making guacamole for the therapy team, the hummus I made last week was a hit, feels good to be back in the kitchen. 

12.15.25

This is the toughest post Ill have to write.  I was going to wait to put it in the book, but it has been weighing heavily on me.  On December 15, 2024 Harv and I had an appointment to see his lawyer again.  We first met with him in August 2024, before I unknowingly would be the last time I got to play golf with my dad and Connor.  My dad always thought my mom cheated on him with the person she babysat for.  He couldn't let it go, especially during treatment when he would vent to me.  The lawyer in August told him he had to sell me the shore house if he didn't want to give half to her.  My dad harped on this and refused to give up the house he worked so hard to build and was in his family.  I was supposed to buy the shore house a year ago with the clause my dad could live there as long as he was alive.  I got the money ready and he was ready to sell and draw up the divorce papers.  He worked months on this plan and told me when we went for Thanksgiving all was done did i have my part done I sad Yes.  Amount we settled for and terms I will leave out. Then his plan got ruined with my stroke.  This I think was the start of his downfall began and he gave up on life.  Alls he wanted was to divorce her and be free and my stroke ended his dream.  I think about i all the time.  Whenever I would see Maureen post stroke she would be like, he's so mean to me.  I wanted to be like yea you have no idea.  In July he said to me Im leaving you and your sister the house, you'll have to buy her out like I did my brother.   In August he went on hospice all drugged up my mom took him and got the will changed putting the house in her name taking everything.  My father passed surrounded by people he hated Maureen and Kath and quote the biggest worry in his life Shannon.  My dads dream crushed now Shannon will inherit everything. God bless her.  Karma will catch up.    I refused to be around those people.   In my mind, I felt like I let him down, but time has allowed that to pass.  He was an adult, he could have changed his scenario.  Maureen had him cremated no service, nothing.  I offered to write the obituary, she said its done.  Horribly written by uneducated people like my Maureen Kath and Shannon, I read it once, special people. I blamed myself for the longest. I was his only true caregiver, I put my health second to him getting cancer-free.  I suffered a stroke because I took care of him so he could give up and die miserably, which annoyed me.  I am finally at peace with it, thanks to my faith and god.  I hope everyone can see the type of people I have had in my life, and I made myself who I am.  Even better once I got rid of them.  My devotional quote in my book today, ironically, was "Karma doesn’t need proof. They spoke and acted behind your back. God was in front of you." God and Karma will take care of me, and my strong faith and people will get what they deserve.  

12.16.2025

Went to Cody's school's Christmas Musical.  He said it meant more this year because Daddy was there.  The boys wrote their letters to Santa, and both of them asked for me to be around this year and to get better.   It made me feel that Linds and I are doing something right, raising these 2.  We often question ourselves but that made it all good.  

12.17.2025

Went and got our Xmas tree and came home and decorated it.  It meant a lot and was extra special after last year. 

12.20.25

First Saturday without sports in 6 months. Slept in, cooked food for the Birds game, went to Sonnys to watch the W drank with friends, it was a good day.   

12.21.25

With no sports, I was able to get back to Church in person instead of online for the first time in months.  It was great seeing everyone.  Code and Linds went to the Meravan Farms hot chocolate get-together with Santa. We live in such a great neighborhood!  Afterwards, we went to Harbaugh Village with the Tulls and Wilsons for some Winter fun.  The boys Ice Skated,  they need to stick to baseball especially Trey lol.  Always love hanging out with great people.

12.24.25  

Merry Christmas Eve! Last night the boys were lying in bed with us. Linds asked them what present they were most excited for, and Cody replied, "having Daddy home" and Connor said me 2.  I quietly teared up....   Glad to be home this year.  Baking cookies for Santa, then heading to Church.  I thought I would be sad, but I'm not.  I miss Harv and Maycee, but that's it.  I'm glad to spend the holiday with people I love, no schedule, no drama, only people I truly wanna be around.   I want to wish all the people I care about a very Merry Christmas.